"Fun" with your social worker

This post could also be titled "What not to do in the presence of your social worker". Tonight we met with Stacie, our adoption social worker, for our 3 month post placement visit. Prior to an adoption, a social worker will conduct a "home study" - meeting in your home on 3-4 occasions to assess your family for your ability to meet the needs of an adopted child, and also to provide training on what to expect and how to handle various behavior or emotional issues prevalent with adopted children. After the adoption, we meet with Stacie at 3 months, 6 months and 12 months post placement. After that, Ethiopia requires that we file annual reports on each of the boys until they turn 18.

After meeting with her on so many occasions, I've come to consider Stacie as a friend, an experienced resource, and a partner on this journey. She always provides real-life examples and stories of other adoptive situations and despite our noble (naive) aspirations, she would always sprinkle some realism into our conversations and remind me to "hope for the best, but prepare for the worst".

Three months into our adoption, it was great to sit down with Stacie with our entire family and discuss the journey with all its ups and downs. This time we were able to draw upon and reflect on our own real-life experiences. Overall - a great meeting and a good feeling of accomplishment about the progress we have made with the boys as a family.

"What not to do with your social worker": The kids were doing their own activities for awhile but pretty soon everyone ended up around the kitchen table together. Jayden was practicing some spelling words on his little dry-erase board. I reached for the gallon-ziploc bag full of markers and pulled the other dry-erase board toward me so I could keep Wesley entertained by drawing pictures of animals as we conversed with Stacie.

All seven of us are sitting around the table, and I have Wesley on my lap. We're all focusing on the conversation as little Wesley dumps the remaining markers out of the ziploc bag, flips the bag up over his head and pulls it down over his head and face. Emme suddenly notices the plastic bag over his head and tries to snatch it off but he has it pulled down pretty tight and it takes a little wrestling to get it off. He wasn't in the throes of suffocation or anything close, but having your child sitting on your lap and not noticing as he pulls a plastic bag over his head does not make for a good impression! Advice: Keep the plastic bags out of your children's reach while meeting with your social worker - and most other times too.